Sagging Economy Forces Workforce Reductions at Santa's Workshop

North Pole, Dec 18th, 2008

The recession has demonstrated it's far reach this year, claiming among it's latest victims, The North Pole. Factory orders at Santa's Workshop are down 40% from last year, forcing cuts in it's labor force.

"I haven't worked in 3 months!" an undisclosed worker said. "My training is too narrow, and it's not exactly easy to get hired as an elf anywhere but The North Pole."

Other laid-off workers are not very hopeful they can find work with the Easter Bunny. Because, no one knows where he lives.

"We saw this before in the 2001, right after the launch of ISanta.com." said Kris Kringle, Chief Executive Officer. "We'll just ride it out. Until then, we're striving for a leaner Santa's Workshop, one that thrives on Elficiency. Our costs of operation are much higher this year. Reindeer run on fodder, not oil!"

"Elficiency, elficiency, elficiency. That's all we hear about!" an undisclosed worker quipped. "We think we've been treated unfairly and ever since the scandal, there's been a deterioration in regards to how management communicates with the workers."

Santa's Workshop was rocked by scandal last month when Kringle faced charges of verbal assault for allegedly calling someone a "Ho" three times. Charges were eventually dropped.

Meanwhile, the Union members have called for a Dec 24th emergency meeting of The International Brotherhood Guild Organization of December (IBGOOD).

"Christmas will go on!" said Kringle. "Despite the expense, we're going ahead with toys for the good children and clean coal technology for the ones who've been bad."

Rudolph was not available for comment.